Over the past fortnight, much of our attention has been focused on both the remainder of 2026 and, increasingly, planning for 2027. While there is still plenty happening across Wimmera Lutheran College this year, Term 3 is an important time for ensuring that we are well prepared for the final term and positioned strongly for the year ahead.

A significant focus has been our 2027 enrolment processes across all three campuses. We are currently working through enrolments, confirming returning students and finalising projected numbers across Horsham, Nhill and Dimboola. It is encouraging to see that enrolments are looking healthy across the College, providing a positive foundation for our planning for next year. Behind every enrolment is a family choosing to place their trust in WLC, and we remain grateful for the confidence our families continue to show in our College and its staff.

Alongside enrolments, our staffing modelling for 2027 is well underway. This is an important and detailed process that considers projected student numbers, class structures, curriculum offerings, teaching loads and the needs of each of our three campuses.

As one College operating across three communities, our aim is to ensure that we use our people and resources effectively while continuing to provide strong learning opportunities and appropriate support for our students. Much of this work happens quietly behind the scenes during Term 3 but is critical to ensuring we are ready to begin 2027 well.

Announcements regarding this will be made across the three campuses in the coming weeks.

This highlights why Term 3 is such an important term in the life of a school. While our students and staff remain firmly focused on the learning and opportunities in front of them, Term 3 is also when many of the decisions and preparations are made that allow Term 4, and ultimately the following year, to operate successfully.

From enrolments and staffing through to budgets, timetables, programs and transition planning, there is a great deal of work occurring across the College.

New Interim Director Of Business Operations, Ms Jana Pavlovska is playing a pivotal role in this process and has had an immediate impact in her role across many areas of WLC. Apart from applying a strong skillset and knowledge, Jana has been intentional about getting to know the people of WLC and the story of the amalgamation. She was able to spend some time at the Nhill and Dimboola campuses last week and enjoyed her time there.

AI in schools

Another important area of development across WLC is our approach to Artificial Intelligence (AI) in education. AI is developing rapidly and is increasingly becoming part of the way people learn, work, communicate and make decisions. As a College, we recognise that our responsibility is not simply to respond to this technology as it emerges, but to ensure we have clear, safe and educationally sound approaches to its use.

Last week, members of our team participated in the second AI in Schools workshop in Melbourne, which forms part of a broader cyber safety initiative. Through this work, WLC is developing an overarching AI policy, together with staff and student user agreements and charters, and clear processes for responding to the inappropriate or unauthorised use of AI. A further workshop will take place next term as we continue to develop this framework.

At the same time, WLC is participating in an AI pilot program exploring how emerging AI tools can be used ethically and effectively within school leadership and administration. This will include investigating ways AI may support planning, communication, meeting processes, data analysis and strategic decision-making. Importantly, this work will occur within appropriate safeguards, with a strong emphasis on privacy, data security and the responsible handling of school information.

Ultimately, our approach is about preparing our College and our students for a changing world. We want our staff and students to understand both the opportunities and responsibilities that come with AI. This means maintaining the importance of critical thinking, creativity, academic integrity and human judgement, while also helping students and staff develop the skills to use emerging technologies safely, ethically and purposefully. As this work progresses, we will continue to keep our community informed about how AI will be approached at WLC.

Multi-Enterprise Agreement update

Wimmera Lutheran College, together with Lutheran schools across Victoria, NSW and Tasmania, is preparing for the commencement of formal negotiations for the next Multi-Enterprise Agreement (MEA), which establishes many of the employment conditions for staff working within Lutheran schools.

The first formal bargaining meeting is scheduled for late August, following considerable preparation by Lutheran Education and employer representatives. As negotiations progress, discussions will consider a range of matters affecting schools and their employees, including remuneration and conditions, teacher workload, staffing arrangements, recruitment and retention, and the particular challenges experienced by rural and regional schools.

LEVNT is also developing a coordinated communication approach designed to ensure information provided to staff and school communities throughout the process is factual, balanced, accessible and consistent. Myself and Damon attended a briefing by LEVNT which focused on the MEA process and this was very helpful and informative. WLC will continue to keep our staff and wider community appropriately informed as negotiations progress.

As I read the sub school and campus newsletter reports and follow the campus Facebook pages, it is clear to see that there is a great deal happening across WLC. I am grateful for the work of our staff across Horsham, Nhill and Dimboola as we continue to strengthen Wimmera Lutheran College as one College serving three communities.

“There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.”
1 Corinthians 12:5–6 (NIV)

Mr Jason Przibilla, Executive Principal

by Stuart Gray

For there is one God and one mediator between God and humankind, the man Christ Jesus, who gave himself as a ransom for all people (1 Timothy 2:5,6a)

Today’s reading raises a difficult question. Are Christians the only ones who will see salvation and eternal life? The text says, ‘For there is one God and one mediator between God and humankind, the man Christ Jesus.’

But the next verse says, ‘… who gave himself as a ransom for all people.’

A definitive answer to the question is way above my pay grade, so I would like to take a wider look at the passage and explore what Paul is saying to us.

First of all, Paul urges us to pray for all people. That’s a big ask. During intercessions, when we have the opportunity to pray for those in our hearts, I soon run out of names of family and friends and a few general categories. But Paul says to pray for all people.

And he has distinctions in prayer: supplications, requests for specific needs; prayers, general worshipful communication with God; intercessions, pleading on behalf of others; and thanksgivings, expressions of gratitude.

Paul says we should pray for all those in authority so we can live in ‘all godliness and holiness’.

And the reason for this? Verses 3 and 4 say, ‘This is good, and pleases God our Saviour, who wants all people to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.’

Again, Paul says God wants all people to be saved and know the truth. And the truth Paul refers to is that there is one mediator between God and humankind. This is ‘the man Christ Jesus who gave himself as a ransom for all people’.

It is clear that Christians are to place their trust in Christ alone as mediator, but God wants the salvation of all people. Thankfully, it is not our role to judge individuals. Our faith is in God’s justice and mercy.

As Christians, we can bear witness to Christ crucified, the mediator between perfect God and sinful humankind; we can respect and love people of other faiths and leave the final judgement to God.

Heavenly Father, we pray that the Holy Spirit works through us to be witnesses to Christ crucified. Help us to treat all people with love and respect. In the name of Jesus, our Lord and Saviour. Amen.

Respect

Respect is a word that has been floating around in my mind this week. It is a circular concept. When we think about giving respect, it moves in a loop: we give it, we receive it, and it comes back to shape the way people treat one another.

In a school context, we expect all staff and students to model respect towards each other. Treating others with respect is a fundamental way we demonstrate how we love and care for one another. Respect affords people dignity and communicates a simple but powerful message: you matter, and you are important to me.

Being respectful is important because it helps us feel safe, valued and able to express ourselves. It means accepting someone for who they are, even when they are different from us or when we do not agree with them.

This can be a difficult concept for both students and adults to learn. Disagreeing with someone is easy; respecting them despite our differences takes patience, maturity and intentional effort.

As a Christian school, I often remind students to “treat people the way you want to be treated.” This is a paraphrase of Luke 6:31, which says, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Known as the Golden Rule, it provides a powerful foundation for how we are called to treat one another and build healthy relationships.

As adults, it is important that we talk about these things with our children, but even more importantly, that we model them. Our children need to see respect in action—to see how we speak to others, how we respond when we disagree, how we handle conflict and how we choose to treat people even when it is difficult.

Respect is not simply something we ask of our children; it is something we all have the opportunity to give, receive and model every day.

Parent-Teacher interviews

Please note that parent-teacher interviews for 2W and 6R will be happening in Week 7 on Tuesday 25 August and Thursday 27 August. Bookings are now open on The Hub for 2W. They will close today, Friday 21 August.

Interviews for 6R have been booked and the school will honour those time slots chosen. If the times no longer work for your family, please contact Admin to change your appointment.

We sincerely thank you for your patience and understanding as we navigated these special circumstances. It is much appreciated.

Father’s Day and Footy Day

We are gearing up to celebrate Father’s Day in style! Wear your favourite footy colours on Friday 4 September, as we enjoy a bit of footy and celebrate this special day with our Dads and special father figures.

The PTFA will be hosting a Father’s Day stall, with gifts available for students to purchase for $5-$10. The stall will be open between 10:20am and 1:00pm with students scheduled to visit with their classes. Families may also pre-order pies and hot dogs through FlexiSchools.

We would love you to come along and join us for this special day.

Activities are scheduled for the times below:

• Lower Primary (Foundation-Year 2): 11:40am-12:40pm
• Lunch and Staff v Students footy game: 1:00pm-1:45pm
• Upper Primary (Years 3-6): 2:00pm-3:00pm

We look forward to celebrating together and enjoying an exciting day of footy, family and fun!

General housekeeping

A reminder during this bout of wet weather for children to avoid puddles coming to and from school or during break times.

Important dates

• 24-28 August - Science Week
• 25 August - Foundation Wimmera Walk (rescheduled)
• 26 August - Year 2 Indigenous Art Excursion
• 2 September- Year 4 Christian Studies Excursion
• 4 September - Father’s Day Footy Day
• 5 September - Robo Cup Vic State Competition
• 9 September - Science Showcase 6-7pm

Awards

FL: Sophia K, Teddy C & Thea K FD: Arlie W & Biden R 1B: Violet F & Jasper M 1S: Jayden M & Lucy S 2H: Winnie D & Twyla S 2W: Baxter A & Holly C 3D: Fred R & Beau M 3N: Indy W, Harriet R & 3N class 4R: Alfred J, Asees B & Tasman C 4M: Roshil U & Sophia B 5K: Laura B & Willow C 5J: Zetta B & Stella B 6H: Adelle R & Daniel A 6M: Blake O & Sienna M 6R: Mia H & Matilda D

Specialist awards:

Art: 2W class & 1S class
German: Kriya K
Chinese: Henry E
Digital Technology: Beatrice S
Performing Arts: Esme C
PE: Year 6 H

Trinity Tiger/Cub Awards

Congratulations to our very special Tiger and Cub awardees!

• Beatrice S - Mallee
• Ryder E - Mallee
• Quinn B - Wimmera

Mrs Christina Jacobsen, Head of Primary

Curriculum & Pedagogy

AI and the Digital Generation: What Parents and Carers Need to Know

Artificial intelligence (AI) is becoming an increasingly common part of our children’s digital world, appearing in social media, games, educational programs and search tools. The Cyber Safety Project in conjunction with Lutheran Education, hosted a webinar this week for all families of WLC which highlighted that while AI offers many exciting opportunities, it also brings new risks that families need to understand. One of the most important messages was that AI should be used as a tool, not as a replacement for human judgement, relationships or trusted adults.

Protecting personal information is more important than ever. AI tools learn from the information users provide, including text, images, videos and audio. Families are encouraged to talk with children about what should never be shared with AI, including names, ages, school details, locations, photographs and other identifying information. A useful rule from the webinar was: don’t put anything into AI that you wouldn’t want to see on a billboard. Families should also check the privacy and data settings of AI platforms, as information may be used to train models by default.

The webinar also emphasised the growing difficulty of distinguishing between what is real and what is AI-generated. Deepfakes and AI-generated images and videos can be extremely convincing, so children need to develop critical thinking rather than simply assuming that everything online is real. Encourage children to pause, look carefully, question what they see and consider whether the information makes sense before believing or sharing it. AI can also confidently provide incorrect information, known as a “hallucination”, making it essential that children learn to check and verify information using reliable sources.

Finally, the Cyber Safety Project encouraged families to approach these conversations with curiosity, warmth and respect rather than fear or judgement. Their RISE framework highlights four important values for navigating AI: Responsibility, Integrity, Strength and Empathy. These values provide a helpful foundation for teaching children to use AI safely, ethically and responsibly; protecting their information, checking what is true, considering the impact of their actions and remembering that people and trusted relationships always come first.

More information can be found here. We are proud to be partnering with the Cyber Safety Project through our technology curriculum in the Horsham Primary School, which is aimed at embedding a culture of online safety and digital wellbeing for all students.

Richest blessings,

Mrs Jacqui North, Assistant Head of Primary School(s): Curriculum & Pedagogy

Robocup Junior event

On Tuesday 18 August, we hosted the regional RoboCup Junior event, where students came together to participate in a series of coding and robotics challenges. A number of our students took part, demonstrating their team work, problem-solving skills, creativity and perseverance as they worked through the challenges. Well done to all our competitors! Congratulations to Lachlan, Jaxson, Riley, Hudson, Thomas, Valeria and Avril for taking out first place in their divisions.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Wimmera Lutheran College - Horsham Campus (@wimmeralutherancollegehorsham)

In preparation for the competition, our RoboCup students were also fortunate to participate in a coaching session last week with Robocup representative David Ebert helping them to further develop their skills and prepare for the competition. Our RoboCup students are a dedicated group who have a genuine passion for coding and robotics, and it has been wonderful to see their enthusiasm and commitment.

Well done to all of our students who participated in both events. A special thank you to Mr Adam Engert, Mrs Amanda Rudolph and Year 11 students Zoe B for their guidance and support of the group, and for helping to make these wonderful events possible.

We wish the students all the best for the state event in Melbourne next month.

Career Taster Day

Our Years 9 and 10 students participated in a Career Taster Day last week, providing them with an opportunity to explore a range of career pathways and gain a greater understanding of the world of work. Students heard from industry professionals about their career journeys and gained practical insights into resumes, interviews, qualifications and the skills needed for employment. The day also included a visit to Federation University, giving students the opportunity to experience a tertiary education environment and consider the possibilities available to them beyond school.

It is important that we continue to open our students' eyes to the many options and pathways available to them as they begin to think about their futures. We thank the LLEN for their support and organisation of the day, as well as Mrs Alicia Schneider for her coordination and work in making the event possible.

Deakin University visit

Deakin University recently visited the College to work with our Years 10 and 11 students, providing them with an opportunity to explore tertiary study options and future pathways. Students learnt more about university life and the range of courses and opportunities available through Deakin, including the Deakin Accelerate program, which allows students to undertake a university subject while in Year 12. Students were also able to participate in individual follow-up meetings, giving them the opportunity to discuss their interests and future study pathways in greater detail.

Parent-Teacher interviews

The coming parent-teacher interviews will be on Tuesday 1 September. Please take note of the following key details:

• The interviews will take place between 2.00pm and 8.00pm
• School will conclude at 1.00pm on this day for Secondary School students only
• If you would like your child to remain onsite, please email their Year Level Coordinator. Supervision will be provided, and students will be expected to complete private study/homework
• School buses will run at their normal scheduled times
• The interview link will be made available on the HUB shortly

Important dates

• Parent-Teacher interviews - Tuesday 1 September
• Year 12 Graduation - Friday 2 November

Mrs Kate Carter, Deputy Principal - Head of Secondary

Years 5-6 Lightning Spike volleyball competition

Thirty-five Years 5 and 6 students competed in the Little Desert ‘Lightning Spike’ Volleyball competition on Wednesday last week. This was a friendly match play where students had the opportunity to experience volleyball against other schools.

WLC will be entering one boys/mixed and one girls team into the Greater Western Region Volleyball Competition in Horsham on 29 October.

Father’s Day Footy Day - Friday 4 September

We are excited to invite students and families to join us for our annual Father’s Day Footy Day at WLC. The day will be filled with AFL-themed activities, a special Father’s Day gift stall and a delicious footy lunch!

Students are encouraged to wear footy-themed casual clothes as a free dress day.

Event schedule

• 11:40am-12:40pm: session one - footy rotations for Foundation to Year 2. Students will rotate through stations including agility course, bump bag relays, goal kicking, tackle bags and more
• 12:45pm-1:40pm: Lunch in the quadrangle
  - Food available by pre-order on FlexiSchools
  - Collect lunch from the canteen
• 1:10pm-1:40pm: Staff v Year 6 students footy match – Junior School Oval
• 2:00pm-3:00pm: session two - footy rotations for Years 3-5 (additional stations include a kicking challenge and mini games)

PTFA Father’s Day stall

Students will have the chance to buy a small gift for their father or special someone.

• Each class has an allocated shopping time throughout the morning
• The stall will be supported by our wonderful Year 6 helpers

Little Desert Division athletics

The next level of school based athletics will be held in Stawell on Wednesday 9 September. This event involves 25 Years 4, 5and 6 students from WLC. Training was to be held this week and next week, unfortunately wet weather has closed our ovals, therefore selected students should seek out of school hours training where possible.

Term 3 sports events

• Wimmera Lutheran College Footy and Father Day - Friday 4 September
• Little Desert Division athletics - Wednesday 9 September

Term 4 sports events

• Greater Western Region athletics - Friday 9 September
• Little Desert Division Years 5 and 6 Cricket Blast - Wednesday 21 October
• Years 3 and 4 Girls Hoop Time region final - Monday 19 October
• Greater Western Region volleyball - Thursday 29 October
• Foundation and Year 3 Learn to Swim Program - 20-23 and 27-30 October
• Years 1and 2 Learn to Swim Program - 4-6 and 16-20 November
• State sthletics - Friday 6 November

Mr Gary Davidson, Head of Sport (F-6)

WestVic Academy of Sport

Our 13 WVAS students have started using the WLC gym space to complete their S&C programs. We also had the WestVic team come down last Thursday to go through each of the programs with the athletes and answer any questions they had. This program is providing great opportunities for our athletes to continually improve their fitness and sporting abilities.

Good luck and well done

Wishing all students competing in the finals of the HDFNL and the final round of the WFNL competitions all the best, and I hope the preparations for the finals series are going well for those fortunate enough to be competing!

Coming events

September

• 1 - Black Ranges Year 7 basketball
• 2 - Black Ranges Year 8 basketball
• 7 - Black Ranges secondary track and field
• 8 - Greater Western Region Years 7 and 8 volleyball

October

• 7 - Black Ranges Year 7 cricket
• 8 - Greater Western Region secondary track and field

Miss Jayde Ellis, Head of Sport (7-12)

Ever notice that sometimes your child is astonishingly open to your ideas and input? You speak, they hear. And other times (read that as: most of the time) they’re less receptive? You speak, they ignore.

Most parenting advice focused on what to say to our children, but not when to say it. Having the right words can be useful, but timing is one of the most overlooked considerations in our communication with our kids. And also one of the most potent.

Think about how you respond differently depending on what’s going on in your life. Sometimes, you’re open, engaged, curious, and actually want input from the people around you. And other times, you shut down. You don’t want to hear from them, and you don’t care about their opinions, advice, or preferences.

Why? What’s the difference?

Simple. The brain’s receptivity fluctuates. Under sustained stress or low mood, attention narrows and new learning doesn’t penetrate. If you’re hungry, emotional, or tired (or lonely or sick) it’s not usually a good time for a deep conversation.

However, a temporary positive shift (perhaps after hard exercise, having a small win, or a moment of real connection) and we see a short window of opportunity open, where the same person who was closed to conversation previously is now open to new perspectives and conversations.

Psychologists describe this process as part of the Broaden and Build theory of positive emotions. It works like this:

Negative emotional states cause us to be narrow, serious, and focused on the challenge right in front of us. We become defensive, protective, and we shut down. Positive emotional states cause us to broaden our thinking, be open to ideas, possibilities, and opportunities, and we build resources like relationships.

My shorthand for all of the psycho-babble is this: high emotions = low intelligence. And the reverse is also true. Low emotions = high intelligence.

How does this apply to parenting? Simple.

Our instinct is to jump in and try to “fix” things fast when what will usually work best is to give it time and address it when the time is “right”.

Here are a few examples starting with simple and moving to more complex:

The spelling words. Your seven-year-old bombed her spelling test and she’s teary about it. The instinct is to sit her down right then and there, and rehearse the words she missed. Don’t. Wait until Saturday morning when she’s giggling over pancakes, then casually say, “Hey, want to play a quick game with those tricky words from last week?” It’s the same activity. But it’s a different brain. And you’ll get a completely different outcome.

The messy room. Your 11-year-old’s bedroom looks like a crime scene and he’s just stomped in the door after a rotten day at school. You could launch into the lecture now (and get eye-rolls, slammed doors, and a room that stays messy). “I told you before you left that you couldn’t do your activity this afternoon if your room wasn’t clean. And you didn’t do it! You know what that means?” Or you could feed him, let him decompress, kick the footy with him for ten minutes, and then mention the room. After connection and a snack, “Mate, let’s take care of that bedroom together and get you to your activity” becomes an invitation rather than an attack.

The friendship drama. Your 14-year-old comes home flat and monosyllabic. Something’s happened with her friends, but every question you ask gets “I’m fine” or “nothing.” Pushing harder now is only going to bolt the door shut. Instead, be around. Drive her somewhere. Make her favourite dinner. Often it’s at 9.30pm, when she wanders into the kitchen while you’re wiping down the bench, that she suddenly starts talking. That’s the moment you’ve been waiting for. Timing is everything. Drop everything (quietly) and listen.

The big one. You’ve searched the history of your son’s web browser and discovered that he’s been viewing content that literally makes you sick. You had your suspicions previously, confronted him, and you’ve been lied to. He’s out, but coming home any moment. Every part of you wants to explode at him the moment he walks in the door. But a confrontation at 10pm, when he’s defensive and you’re furious, won’t work for anyone. High emotions, low intelligence; for both of you. Sleep on it. The next afternoon, side by side in the car (no eye contact required), open with curiosity rather than accusation: “I saw what you’ve been doing on the computer while you were out last night. I’m not going to yell. Help me understand what’s going on.”

None of this means we let things slide or avoid the hard conversations. It means we pick our moment so the hard conversations actually work. The words matter. But the window matters more. Wait for it, and you’ll find your child was capable of listening – and answering – all along.

By Dr Justin Coulson

We are accidentally raising fragile children.

It’s not because we’re bad parents. It might be the opposite. It’s because we’re “good ones”. We love our kids so much that we smooth the path ahead of them, intervene when things get hard, and rescue them from discomfort before it has a chance to teach them anything.

It feels like protection. It might be the opposite. But it takes wisdom to know the difference. And it’s hard because it seems that the stakes are high.

About ten years ago, my daughter (Abbie), came home from school in tears. Her best friend, Abby, had discovered that her mum’s cancer had returned after years of remission. The doctors had caught it too late. He body was riddled with it, and the prognosis was terminal. Four weeks. Christmas.

Abbie announced that, to support her friend, she would sign up for the Leukemia Foundation’s “World’s Greatest Shave”. We asked what colour she would dye her hair. Her response: “I’m not dying it. I’m shaving it.” We tried to convince her it was a bad idea. The possibility she would be teased or worse worried us. Grade 8, we suggested, can be tough on kids who look different. Abbie dismissed our concerns. She was all in.

Sadly the doctors’ forecast was accurate. Mrs Johnson passed away at Christmas time. We hoped Abbie would change her mind about the shave but she grew more determined.

The day arrived. Abbie’s head was shaved with Abby, Mr Johnson, and our entire family bearing witness. Thousands of dollars were raised in honour of Abby’s mum, Mrs Johnson. And many tears were shed as our brave daughter said goodbye to her hair.

Now for the sad part. Despite her bravery, despite the school principal inviting Abbie onto the stage at assembly to describe what she’d done and how much she’d raised, despite the Johnson’s being well known in our school community, and despite the applause for her efforts, Abbie came home in tears on many afternoons. She was called names. She was pushed and shoved. Her lunch was stolen. Abbie was “different”, and the kids let her know it.

“Do you regret it?” I asked one afternoon as I comforted her.

“Dad, my hair will grow back”, she responded. “But the Johnson’s don’t get their mum back. It’s a small price to pay.”

Anti-Fragile

Nassim Taleb is a statistician and philosopher who thinks about risk and uncertainty. He claims there are three kinds of systems:

1. Fragile ones – the type that break under pressure.
2. Resilient ones – the kind that absorb a shock and return to where they were.
3. Antifragile ones – which use stress as fuel. They don’t just survive difficulty. They grow because of it.

Most of us are trying to raise resilient kids. Taleb invites a more interesting question: what if we aimed higher?

The trap we don’t see coming

Fragility rarely announces itself. A child whose parents have smoothed every conflict, intervened in every struggle, and removed every meaningful obstacle can look perfectly capable – right up until the moment they aren’t. The problem isn’t that these kids lack love or support. It’s that they’ve never had the chance to build internal architecture for stress.

When difficulty finally arrives – and it always does – they have no practiced response. Weakness was never allowed to become strength.

Resilience versus antifragility

Resilience means returning to baseline. It’s recovery. It’s important, and we should cultivate it. But antifragility is the capacity to be changed by hard experiences in ways that leave you better equipped, not merely restored.

A child who navigates a painful friendship fallout without a parent stepping in to fix it doesn’t just get through it. They learn about conflict, about emotion, about repair, in ways no amount of coaching from the sideline could teach. The difficulty was the lesson.

Presence without rescue

This doesn’t mean leaving kids to struggle alone, or treating hardship as automatically character-building. This is not a “toughen up princess” message. Chronic stress without support is damaging, not developmental.

The antifragile environment is one where a child encounters age-appropriate difficulty and knows they’re not alone in it.

The parent’s role shifts from problem-solver to context-setter. You’re not fixing the situation. You’re providing the secure base from which they can engage with it themselves.

For a primary school child, that might mean resisting the urge to call another parent when friendship gets complicated, and instead sitting with your child while they figure out what they want to do. For a teenager, it might mean allowing a poor decision to carry its natural consequences, and being present for the debrief rather than the prevention. You’re nearby, not in between.

The children who adapt when plans fall apart, who recover from failure without collapse, who find their footing in genuinely hard circumstances – they’re rarely the ones who had the smoothest ride. They’re the ones whose difficult experiences counted for something. Who felt the weight of things, and discovered they could carry it.

I almost prevented my daughter from having one of the most powerful experiences of her life. By getting out of the way but staying nearby, she showed me she was stronger than I could ever have known.

By Dr Justin Coulson